Ready to Run!

Elliptical, Swimming and weights so nice. I am LOVING my new routine at Pro Health. I start by breaking a sweat with 20 minutes on the elliptical. Then I tone my arms on machines, stretch and crunch my abs. Then I bust it out in my new Speedo (with a tight little skirt, ha!) AND new goggles and swim 20 laps. I even bust out the flippers, y'all! HA!! The flippers, although not the most attractive accessory, really burn the thighs...wow. My thighs and arms are really toning up. Every time I pass a mirror I do a double take at my biceps. Hell yes! Ok...I am feeling kind of bad about something but MUST discuss. I KNOW this is going to get me a few judgemental and/or nasty mean emails. Here's the deal. I miss running. I so so so miss running. It is so nice to throw on my running shoes and a sweat shirt, grab the stroller and my i pod, and hit the pavement. 20 Minutes of the cool air hitting my face and listening to dramatic girl power music always does the trick. I despereately need this again in my life! It clears my head, keeps me energized, it is the BEST stress reliever and it really melts the fat. The main reason I do it is for the stress relief. So you are saying to yourself, "What the heck are you getting at, Liz?!" Ok! I'll tell you. I can not run and breastfeed at the same time fool! I might as well be singing, "My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard....and their like, it's better than yours.....I could teach you, but I'd have to charge......." Get the picture?? Ouch and ewww. It's something I must consider and decide on my own. I think I'm ready though. I went 9 months of breast feeding with Carter but with George I think 6 weeks is the finish line. BY THE WAY.......George is killing me with his lactose intolerate tummy! I am not allowed ANY DAIRY! Try eating 6 small meals a day that are high in protein with THAT hanging over your head! Close to impossible. I think it's time to bust out the soy formula.

Today

I want to blog but I am too tired and baby George is crying. :/ Soooooooo just checking in I guess. I will quickly say I am down another 3 pounds! 16 pounds until I am back to my pre baby weight. After that I have another 30 to go to reach my ultimate weightloss goal. George has been gassy with tummy problems so the doc said I should cut out dairy. WOW has that made such the difference!!! I would never in a million YEARS EVER EVER EVER suggest or even try doing this, but when it is for my child, I didn't think twice. The pounds are really shedding now. Today I kind of went crazy at the gym. I was listening to Pink Radio on Pandora and I couldn't stop. Elliptical, Stairs, Track and then laps at the pool. According to the Myfitness pal AP (including breast feeding) I burned over 1200 cals today. Dang right! Oh I love my little ones so much. They are the greatest joy. Anytime I get down and not really feeling the gym of the low carb grub, I look at them and keep going. I want to run and play with them...not sit on the sidelines hoping no one notices me adjusting the waist line of my jeans. EXAUSTED, Liz ps I know I always so this but dont judge the grammer...i dont have time to edit. xoxo

Meal examples per your request!

Jimmy Dean Breakfast Delights, Oatmeal, Kashi Bars with one spoonfull of PB, Banana and PB, Hummas with a few wheat crackers or veggies, Rice Cakes with PB, Pamento Cheese on whole wheat bread/crackers (pita or regular), turkey and laughin cow cheese wrap, all Atkins snacks...YUMMY! Only one a day though. I have the Carmel Coffee Atkins shake ssometimes for breakfast. Tons of protein, 1 gram of sugar and real coffee in it!! The chocolate bars are awesome too. I love Atkins brand stuff!! EAS Protein Shake (110 cals), Powerade Zero, Low carb wheat tortilla wraps to make yummy wrap sandwiches: add feta, deli meat or tuna/chicken salad and veggies! Chicken salad on Tomato slices, Edumame, Homemade smoothie with fruit and skim milk or banana, peanut butter, protein powder (low sugar!) Go to town with these and get creative! Mozzorrella string cheese and turkey wrap, Veggies and ranch. For Dinner: Chicken, Tuna or salmon filet. Frozen from Sams are best. Saute veggies or make a salad...can serve with whole grain or wild rice. Sweet potato. NO BREAD AT NIGHT! :) Hope this helps! Baby crying gotta go!

Feed the Beast!

13 Days ago I gave birth to a precious baby boy. When I checked into the hospital to be induced I weighed in at a whopping 250 pounds. The exact same weight that night I got induced with Carter, my first born, 2 1/2 years earlier. That is A LOT of weight! It's OK. I'm pregnant! Jessica Simpson got up to 170 and is 5'3 which is the equivilant to me, I told my 5'8 self. Dang. But that's a lot of weight. And she gets a lot of fat jokes made at her expense. You are growing a baby! Shut up and relax. Don't worry. Just focus on getting your beautiful baby boy here safely. Blessed beyond words, we arrived home 3 days later and I had to know...240. 240?! I thought the baby plus fluid plus placenta plus whatever else was in there was at least 13 pounds! ONLY 10 pounds gone!! My baby weighed 8 lbs 2 oz! What the heck? I went downstairs STARVING and ready to fuel my breastfeeding body when I realized...I can do this the hard way or the easy way. Start tomorrow or start RIGHT NOW. Ignore my reality or face the facts. I decided I was going to tackle this issue immediately. I wanted to begin right away. And so I did. EVERY TWO HOURS. That is how often I eat. Small, high protein, low sugar "meals". Lots of water. And, well that's it. It's not brain science. It is simply trick your body into MELTING OFF THE FAT. I can't tell you how many idiots complain to me about how they can't lose weight and then it finally comes out that they don't even eat breakfast. Or they go 4 or 5 hours without eating. They are actually bragging about the long peroid of time they were able to function with out food. Do you know what you are doing? You are making your body go into survival mode! You body is saying, "STORE FAT!!! We are starving!!!" When you eat every two hours, your timid little self KNOWS it can count on your next meal and therefore is BURNING fat like you wouldn't believe! Teach your body to trust you. FEED THE BEAST! Feed it consistantly every 2 hours and it will learn to trust you and melt off the lard. But Liz, I bust my butt at the gym and still can't lose weight!" TOTAL BS! Sorry, friend but it is. You know what I say to my pitty party gym goers? I tell them that if they aren't eating right, they are working out just for fun. Exercise has so many benefits and I can't go a day with out it. HOWEVER, you must train yourself to see those gym calories as a BONUS! Try to ignore they are even there so you don't sabatoge your diet in thinking you can over eat! Now listen to this...and listen good! This morning I weighed in at 222 pounds. IT IS MELTING OFF and you now know why. There is an AP called "My Fitness Pal". This AP is so awesome and we can actually connect with each other for support. My user name is Lizwetzler. Friend me! You need accountabily if you really want to lose the weight. It is a tough battle but together we can do it! I have lost 18 pounds and 2 sizes in 2 weeks. THIS WORKS! And the best part is...YOU ARE NEVER HUNGRY! Stop trying to ignore food! FEED THE FREAKIN' BEAST!!! Love and Kisses, Liz (Sorry for the typos-I can't afford an editor just yet.)

I am so happy to be back on my blog after 9 months of a GRUELING pregnancy. My morning sickness lasted 21 weeks, and then when that was over my immune system pretty much shut down causing sickness, after sickness, after sickness. I was in bed and felt like I was dying pretty much the whole time. I literally thought my baby was going to come out with 4 heads or something because it was so incredibly hard. The plan had been to stick to my 6 small meals a day and work out my entire pregnancy...but that DID NOT HAPPEN. Yeah, not even a little bit. It was fast food, milk shakes, bed rest and medication. I don't think I cooked a single meal during my pregnancy. It was an exciting night at the Wetzler home when I would pop a frozen casserole into the oven and then retreat back to my cell. Baby George was born October 19 and was absolutely perfect. I was so scared of what he might look like that when I saw him I didn't recognize him! I was surprised to see that he looked just like his big brother Carter did when he was born. I was so thankful to God for giving me such a beautiful and healthy little boy. I won't go into how my epidural didn't take...that would just be too much complaining for my style. After George was born I got out of bed and walked into the bathroom. That was the fabulous thing about the epidural not working...I was mobile immediately after the birth. I loved it. When I returned to bed, a little light headed, the nurse asked what I wanted for lunch. She said I could have whatever I wanted. I gave her a blank stare because I was thinking. I was thinking about my first food decision post baby. I didn't have any more excuses. It was meal one of my journey and I wanted it to begin as soon as possible. I was tired of eating crap. I wanted to get this party started immediately. She saw I was a little shy and began listing off my choices. “You can have a cheeseburger and fries.......what about a pizza? Do you want some ice cream or a milk shake? What are you craving?” I smiled and said, “Actually I would love a big salad with lots of raw veggies, some grilled chicken on top and some ranch dressing with a bottled water. Can they make me that?” She laughed and said, “You go girl.” Moments later my hospital room phone rang and it was the kitchen. I literally had to repeat this, what I thought to be a simple request, about 6 times before they believed that I really did want this as my first meal post baby. When my food arrived, I saw that they just couldn't help themselves...They added two buttered rolls, apple pie, and 2% milk. I only ate the salad. Three days later I was welcomed home to a house full of treats! A box of assorted giant size muffins tormented me as I opened the box and starred down at them. Just one bite. Just one muffin! I deserve it! I just gave birth! I am breastfeeding and George he NEEDS me to eat this! I took a deep breath and calmly asked myself, how are you going to feel AFTER you finish the damn muffin? If I had chosen the muffin, I would made bad choices the rest of the day and I knew that about myself. I knew that if I made the strong choice, that I would stay on track and conquer the goal that was so important to me! I want to be healthy, happy, and strong for my boys and for myself! I walked away and made a small plate of hummus, cheese, mixed nuts and fruit. I felt energized and strong and KNEW I had made the right choice. Since then I have continued making the right choice. I have lost 12 pounds since returning home from the hospital. In 10 days I have lost 2 sizes. I am back in my old clothes and feeling so strong! I get to begin my exercise in 4 days and I already have my plan. I will be sharing my weight, food logs, weaknesses, struggles, accomplishments, ect with you day by day.

7 Months Pregnant

Back from the dead. Let me start by saying around my last blog entry back in February, my morning sickness began. I do not want to complain because I am so excited and grateful to be expecting another precious baby boy. However, it is hard to ignore the fact that I have never in my life experience so much consistant pain and sickness. To say that I was and still am completley miserable is the biggest understatement. I love being upbeat and positive. I love smiling and being happy. I live to laugh. I truly am one of those life-loving people. So who am I right now?? Not quite sure. I feel like a different person. Like right now for example, I am sitting on the couch trying not to think about the fact that I am so nauseous or the fact that it feels like a knife is being twisted into my left ear. My ear hurts so bad and I can not hear out of it. For the past 5 nights I wake up every 3 hours crying and putting in my ear drops and taking my tyleonol. Last night, Mike decided to sleep in the guest room so at least one of us could get some rest. I have 3 months to go and that is when I start to feel depressed. That seems so far away! Not to mention, I have been through this rodeo before and I know how hard it is once the baby actually arrives. So yeah, I feel pretty hopeless and scared out of my mind. I am clinging to my God and taking it one day at a time. That really is all I can do. I am trying to have a good attitude and make light of all my handicaps, but now that I am sitting alone and typing in silence, I can not help but just let it all out. Speaking of letting it all out...I AM HUGE. I feel so fat and ugly. My face is in rare form and nothing fits. Even if it did fit, I would be too hot to put it on. I turned 30 last week and I am going to dinner this week with some friends to celebrate. I can not help but be totally consumed with anxiety because I have nothing to wear. I keep telling myself, "It's OK you are pregnant. No one expects you to look that great." But it is so hard for me right now for some reason. I want to look good and feel good and I just don't. I do not want to live in self pity or continue this bad attitude. I want things to change. After 7 months, you would think things would be getting better by now, but unfortunately that is not the case. So my plan is to breath deep and take it one hour at a time. I apologize for sounding so negative!!!!!!!!!!!!! I hate it! I do, however, feel it necessarry to get it out and be honest with myself. This is a blog about lifestyle and I want to do it, good days and bad.

Memories

My first memory of food...let's see...............

Dinosaur soup. I was in the first grade at St. Paul's and we were studying Dinosaurs. As a class we made a huge pot of soup. The big red tomatoes were the bloody Dino's eyes, the kidney beans were the kidneys, I guess, the corn was something important and I am sure there was a lot more but I will never forget how amazing that soup was. I have tried to recreate it several times in the last 25 years and have never quite gotten it right. The weird thing is, I hate soup! I mean, I will eat it if it is put in front of me, and I usually am very pleased. However, the thought of it is so boring to me.

Now that I am being healthy I may try it again.

Get Up and Get Out!

"Just keep swimming...Just keep swimming..." I feel like Dori from Finding Nemo. I am always trying to "Just keep swimming" or in a more literal sense, just keep MOVING! I could have easily just played around the house with Carter this morning. We could have watched Disney movies and lounged around. I could have just kept on cleaning up the house while he starred into the TV, but I chose NOT to do that. It was a choice. I got into the car and we went to the park at 10 am. Instead of parkin' it on the bench I joined in on the fun. I used this as an opportunity to burn some calories.

I was running around, climbing up the slide the wrong way, up and down the rock wall, playing on the swings, and squeezed into the little bouncy car the rocks back and forth. Yes, I was THAT parent.

We played for only 30 minutes, but that 30 minutes was great quality time with my child and it burned at least 100 calories. An added bonus was that it wore him out and he was down for a nap at 11:30!

So get up and get out! Your kids and your thighs are waiting.

(Any other flexible schedule parents around Midtown that would like to join? It would have been safer with more people. Please let me know!)

Fools Rush In

You know that feeling in the morning when your like, "I am not hungry. I do not want to eat. I think I will just have some coffee and go. Wow I am so skinny for not needing breakfast!." These are thoughts are lies lies lies!!!

I am so sorry to be the one to say this, but stop being such an IDIOT!!! Point blank: If you skip breakfast, you will NEVER lose weight. So many fat people think they are doing so great when they tell me, "I didn't have anything to eat today until lunch!" I want to say, "Well, good for you! You have officially tricked your body into thinking you are starving and to STORE FAT!"

So many of us by into diet pills. Diet pills usually promise to boost, or speed up, your metabolism. Friend, listen to me carefully when I say this...the best way to boost, or speed up, your metabolism is to simply eat something right when you wake up!!

When you have been sleeping for over 4 hours, your stomach becomes empty. You brain is so smart and incredibly efficient. Let's just say, if we ever end up on a deserted island, the body knows just what to do. It will kick into survival mode and store your fat!

When you put food in your mouth in the morning, picture yourself through a coal on the fire. This coal keeps the fire going and at a steady pace. We are not throwing 10logs on it to make it blaze out of control, just a enough to keep it going. You do NOT want that fire to go out. We want it to continue burning fat and NOT think we are starving on a deserted island.

This morning I was nauseous at the thought of eating anything. I was completely satisfied with my coffee and wanted to exit the kitchen. I knew that if I did this, my body would not start burning the fat off my thighs. I got out the skillet and had two eggs sunny side up. I sat down and took a bite that I felt like I did not "need".

It does not impress me, your friends, or your body when you skip breakfast. It actually makes you look like a big dumb idiot. Ignorant in the food department. I was there and didn't realize how important this was! I am begging you to eat breakfast no matter how you feel.

Food Ideas:
Oatmeal
Eggs
Jimmy Dean Egg, Sausage and Cheese Delights
Fruit

I eat eggs and whole wheat toast or a Jimmy Dean with every day. I always have a side of fruit. You should look forward to breakfast! It is the biggest meal we get! If you really want to lose this weight.

Tonight go ahead and decide what you are going to have in the morning so you don't have to think too hard about it.

BREAKFAST IS FOR WINNERS!

Weigh-In Day=SCARY

Today is Thursday which means one thing....WEIGH DAY! If you read my previous post you are aware of my fear of getting on the scale today. I had 3 pretty bad evenings this week in regards to food. HOWEVER, I had 6 intense work out days, and 4 really good days on my diet.

Last week I was 201. I was hoping that this week i would drop below the 200's and into the dusty 100's!! This morning I woke up and prayed, "Lord please help me to not be discouraged when I see this number." Than the number 205 popped in my head. This was my prediction for this mornings way in.

I was tempted to skip the weigh in all together and just really try hard this week. I wanted to do this to protect myself from getting discouraged. Then I remembered...It is OK. I am not perfect. It is not over if I gain this week. I do not have to beat myself up if I gain.

200. I LOST A POUND! No, I did not get down into the 100's, but I did in fact lose this week! 200 EVEN! I am so proud of myself and I am VERY happy with that number. I am one step closer to my goal!!!

Recap: Goal Weight= 170lbs

30 more to go!!!

Oops...

Wow...that is the 5th day this week that I have taken a mid-day nap for over 2 hours! I have been so exhausted. The only things I have done differently have been joining my awesome new gym (Phoenix Fitness) and I went back to work (2 half days a week). Those are two really big changes now that I see them in writing! NO WONDER!

I feel like I am not going to lost weight this week. I feel great and very sore from working out but I also feel like I need to share something else. I am feeling very guilty and quite ridiculous. The last 3 days for no apparent reason, I have had Carter's left over scrapps at dinner, my own dinner with wine, and to top it off, 3 scoops of vanilla ice cream with frozen fruit on top. I have 107 different excuses for each of those actions but I will not waste yours or my time.

It is a scary thought for me fo some reason to get below the 200's. I want it SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO bad though! I am at a loss of words. I need help.

I found some words! I know what I need to do and here is what it is. KEEP GOING! I will plan my dinners better and give the dog Carter's scraps. I won't have things in the house that will tempt me and if I do, I will practice self-control. I forgive and love myself and I know that I can do this. Lord, please give me the strength today and tonight to honor my body and my commitment.

??????

Writer's Block.

If Madonna Can Cartwheel on Bleachers...

I worked out really hard at the gym today. I went on a family bike trip, fed the ducks at Municipal Park, took a two hour nap and then went to a friends house for the Super Bowl.

I am tired but had a great day.

Good Night.

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HA!!!!!! So the post above was me late last night just trying to stick to my commitment of daily blogging. Let me start over... (Thank you to my blog accountability partner, Amy for making me redo this one!!)

SUPER BOWL SUNDAY!!!!! Of course I did not watch a single play, but I thoroughly enjoyed the company of some friends munching and chatting it up in the dining room. Surrounded by that famous buffalo dip, that yummy chex mix desert thing with the powdered sugar, homemade chili, and my veggie tray I was just being a normal person.

It was exciting to me that I did not sneak into the kitchen 25 times so no one would see me binging. I had a few bites of the bad stuff but nothing to through me over the edge. ONE CHOICE AT A TIME.

Speaking of choices...what in the heck was Madonna thinking. Those boots maaaaaaaaaay have been a mistake. I have to hand it to her, however, for being in such great shape. She is at least 50 something years old and doing cartwheels on bleachers. More power to ya Madonna!

I guess I better step it up!!!

"You Should Be Ashamed Of Yourself"

This is me asleep at my college graduation. The ceremony was 4 hours long and me and my best friend, Erin were really cracking ourselves up here. I would rest my eyes while she was on the look out and then she would take her turn. The two silliest and MOST FUN girls in the world and this picture proves it. By the way, as we took our diplomas on stage, Erin and I held hands and did an old fashion curtsey to the audience.

(Deep Breath...)I just woke up from an amazing nap on a lazy Saturday. I needed it. My eyes are still heavy and I feeling relaxed as Beethoven is softly playing in the distance. Sitting here I feel firm and together. I feel accomplished and happy. I am proud of the way I have chosen to get here. I have used honesty, self-control, discipline, and humility to reach this point.

Last night I was at a dear friend's house discussing all of life's challenges. People fail us all the time. We really can't figure out why things have to be so hard and painful all the time. We were sitting there happy that we had each other and happy that we were both doing so well in our own personal lives. We love our husbands, we love our children, we love the Lord and we love the gym. We have not always been able to say that all at once, and it feels good.

She mentioned that she loved my blog and I began explaining why I did it. I started this blog because I was desperate to lose weight. I needed to be open and honest with the public in order to pull myself out of denial. I needed accountability.

NO DIET WILL EVER WORK FOR YOU...until you are REALLY ready to lost the weight. You must get an accountability partner on your team. You must call them up and say, "I am tired of being fat, and I want you to know that I am going to change right now. Will you hold me accountable?" You must accept the truth about yourself and find the support you need.

In your childhood you have the love and support of your parents. In your marriage you have it from your spouse, if you are or were an athlete you had it from your coach...you get the picture. You need support if you are really going to do this.
Stop hiding from the truth. It is not a big deal. People want to help you. Do not be ashamed of your weight or your size.

When I was in high school, I would cut the size 14 tags out of my jeans so that no one would know. I was truly ashamed of my body. No wonder I couldn't lost the weight. I had no support from myself, much less anyone else.

I want to encourage you to start being a little kinder to yourself. Don't put yourself in the corner anymore (Yes,I mean like Baby from "Dirty Dancing"). There is no way you can shine from there.

I recently have learned this:
I am through hating myself and beating myself up.
I am good person and I have good intentions.
I love others, I love myself and above all I love the Lord.
I want to honor God with my words, my thoughts and my body.

We have all been raised hearing things like, "You should be ashamed of yourself". You may hear this ridiculous phrase after falling asleep at your college graduation, skipping class in high school to make out with your boyfriend, or stealing gum from the store when you were five.

Yep, and these are just 3 of the hundreds of things I have done to be ashamed of myself.

That was the past and you know what? I'm NOT ashamed of myself, I just need some good guidance and a treadmill. But thanks for the suggestion!

Try to be a better person by making better choices. This starts with the choices you make for YOURSELF. By taking care of yourself, everyone around you will benefit. Pray for integrity, wisdom and the understand of what God's love really is. He loves you just the way you are and you should not be ashamed of yourself. But, you should take better care of yourself. That's what I'm doing. Join me. The grass really is greener over here.

Skinny Friends Rule!

This is one amazing mother with one amazing BOD!

Sitting in the kitchen watching Jane Ellen scurry around was an incredible learning moment for me. She was multi-tasking like I had never seen. Truly the strongest and coolest person I know. She was baking, cleaning, and entertaining me with her stories as I sat and eagerly listened to everything she had to say. She has a rock hard body and beautiful skin. She is energized and full of life. She has two children who adore her and tweet around her all day long like two little chicks so dependent on their mother hen.

As I was soaking it all in watching in amazement as she got out the blender, she started filling it with raw baby spinach leaves, cucumbers, blueberries, strawberries, pineapple, almonds and FLAX SEED!!! She flipped the switch and the blender went to town. With the blasting sounds of the blender in the background the kids immediately jumped up from playing with their toys and ran into the kitchen screaming, "SMOOTHIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

She then proceeded to pour them each a glass of this purple concoction. My 1 year old immediately wanted in on the action, and as stood there watching in disbelief as she handed him his own rain forest blend, he chugged the whole thing.

I thought he would take a sip and spit it out on the floor. The only thing that needed to be picked up off the floor, however, was my jaw. Jane Ellen, all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, then handed me a huge glass of her love potion. I could not wait to taste this Ripley's-Believe-it-or-not drink. I took a big swig and could not believe that this amazing blueberry smoothie actually had everything my naked eyes had just witnessed being put in it.

The next day I went to Sam's and bought all of the ingredients. It has been over a week and Carter and I both have had one of these smoothies snacks almost every day. He loves them and so do I. Can you believe this?? Try it!

My final thought is this...Start hanging out with healthy, skinny people. You will learn a lot and really discover why they look so great. Skinny people don't advertise their secrets probably out of fear of being persecuted for their healthy ways. Try hanging out with your skinny friends in a comfortable at home setting and TAKE NOTES!

25 POUNDS

As of today I have lost 25 pounds.

I was 201 this morning. I am so close to being under 200!!! This will be such an exciting day when I can see my weight begin with the number ONE.

This morning after seeing how close I am to being done with the 200 pound range...I immediately started to freak out...and NOT in a good way. I was scared. I was scared that I would binge eat sometime today and screw it all up. I didn't want to sabotage myself. I want to succeed and I want to be strong. I want to have discipline and practice self-control.

I frantically starting texting Garland and Tripp, my life coaches that have held my hand every step of this journey. After discussing with them my fears and thoughts, they talked me down from the ledge that I was standing on. They reminded me that I can not just throw it all away in one afternoon. They reminded me that this is my lifestyle and I shouldn't be scared anymore. They brought me back to reality where I could breath again. I could see clearly. I am so excited and thrilled to continue this journey and kick some butt!

I CAN'T BELIEVE I HAVE LOST 25 POUNDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Which Pig Are You?

Me about 2 weeks ago. I was burning with my dad. I got here by being a "pig will". In order to have an active healthy lifestyle try saying yes to random activities people invite you to. There's a story my dad would tell me and my sisters about 2 pigs (ironic, huh?!). One was a "pig will" and one was a "pig won't". The "pig won't" missed out on a lot of fun actvities by always turning down invitations. The "pig will" had a great life. Are you a "pig will" or a "pig won't"? Just remember, "pig wills" are skinnier than "pig wont's". They also have a lot more fun.

Back to work today. I have been out for about 6 weeks now but have decided to go back to my Medical Sales job. It is only 2 half days a week and so I can still be with my little man. Today some of the nurses told me how skinny I looked. I found myself teaching these eager beaver nurses how to be healthy! I loved it.

This morning I got out of bed and my pajama pants litterally dropped to my ankles. That's right I lost 2 pounds over night. I am finally back to where I was before the Holiday's took over my body. I was 202 today. I am 3 pounds away from being in the 100's and I am so ready to be there!

Today's Food intake so far...
7am whole wheat english muffin, egg whites, turkey sausage and mozzorella cheese/coffee, milk and creamer...water
9:30 Power Bar (Sugar:only 2 grams!! Be so careful with anything out of a box! Look at the sugar!! If it has more than 7 grams per serving, don't eat it!)...water
11:45 Baby Spinach greens, tomaotes, cucumbers, feta, humas, sting cheese, grilled chicken with balsamic vinegerette dressing...water

It is raining so I am trying to decide what to do for my work out today.

I am feeling really blah right now. I really need to clean but I am so wanting to take a nap. Carter is napping and it would be the perfect time. I am going to be strong and CLEAN!

Answered Prayer

Waking up feeling energized is the best feeling ever. I am enjoying my husband and my son. I am not in la la land distracted and missing the moment. I am present. I am enjoying my life. In bible study this morning I was overwhelmed with joy. It just dawned on me all of a sudden how much God loved me. Maybe because we were in a chapter that primarily focused on His love for us as His children. He really is in to details though! I have been praying, "Lord please help me lose weight" for over 20years! He has finally answered this prayer. The crazy thing is however, that during that 20 year journey of being chubby and frustrated, He was growing me. I wasn't ready to experience freedom in the area of eating yet. He needed to refine me and teach me a lot more about being dependent on Him and finding joy in all circumstances. He is blessing my diligence and my prayers. Thank you God.

Like a Glove

The picture above is me 6 years ago at a Mardi Gras ball. Not the typical debutant, but I sure did know how to have a good time! That dress hasn't seen the light of day since that night...

It never gets easy. It is a constant do this and do that! Make sure to remember to eat this and don't eat that. You better do that before you do that! Remembering to eat every 2 hours is not as easy as you would think. My grocery bill has shot out the roof. Grocery shopping seems to be my new activity. I am always making a list of things we need and I am always shocked to see the food going so fast. The cost and the constant eating really is worth it. I don't binge eat anymore and I am feeling so healthy and energized. I have lost 23 pounds in 4 months. The most exciting thing is that I have kept it off.

Did anyone notice how much Kim K was eating during those 8 weeks of marriage. I literally felt her pain. I almost wanted to eat with her because I could feel her misery. Each episode for those eight weeks she kept getting bigger and bigger. I felt so bad for her. That is what happens when we don't deal with our issues and we suppress our pain with food. It made me feel good to know that I was not the only one who did that but even more that I stopped doing that all together. I am sure it has been hard on my family and friends because I have never been more of an open book. I basically say everything I am feeling. I cry a lot, I vent a lot, I laugh a lot, and I MOVE a lot. I am constantly doing new and adventurous activities and finally living life. I am waking up with a smile and ready to conquer the day. No regrets anymore. No wishing I had done this or putting off saying that. No more waking up with anxiety putting off having to deal with another unresolved issue. This, my friend is called living life.

Next week is Mardi Gras and I can't afford new clothes. I have accumulated beautiful clothes over the last 10 years from going to college, making my debut and getting married. These clothes have not seen the light of day in SEVEN years and could really use a drink.

I got them all out yesterday of the dark coat closet in the hallway. I have been ignoring them for years knowing that I probably would never wear them again. I took a deep breath, pulled on my girdle and had Mike fasten my long line bra (you know the corset long strapless moulon rouge type bra??) The last time that thing had been worn was on my wedding day.

Standing there all squeezed in tight, I glanced behind me to check myself out in the mirror. "Hmmmm", I thought.

I picked up my couture green silk one shoulder dress that has ZERO spandex in it and can only work if it truly slides on like a glove. As I zipped up the side I turned and face the mirror. It was perfect. I could not believe my eyes. The last, and only, time I had ever worn this emerald masterpiece was 7 years ago to a debutant party for my dear friend Lee Smith, God rest her soul.

Everything after that fit, fit and fit again! It was so much fun and so much better than shopping for new things. I have 30 pounds to go before I reach my final goal and I am ready to really jump back into this. I have been maintaining and doing great but I am now ready to keep on trucking and really finish this. I will post pics of me in the green dress after I wear it next week.

I am going to try to blog a little bit every day. I'm sick of these huge breaks! I will do better. I think it will really help me to be more consistent with my blogs.

Thank YOU

I am blown away to see that over 200 people read my blog today. I can't believe this. I appreciate all the support and love. I can definitley feel the love right now. I am feeling so empowered and excited. I felt so alone and sad for myself before this moment. I have Christ who gives me strenth and life and He has blessed me with an army of supporters. I know I can do this! Just so we are keeping it real, I have to admit that I binge ate today. Not just once but THREE times. I was so scared of what I had written and I was just waiting for someone to email me something hateful but that never happened. Instead I was loved and comforted. Thank you to my mom especially who comforted me dearly once she read my blog. She didn't see the pain in my until she read it. I hate talking out my issues becuase I feel like I am complaining and complaining may just be my biggest pet peave. Anyways, I am feeling so strong and like a hot warrior princess in an animal skin mini-skirt so WATCH OUT! RARRRRRRRRR!

Winter Blues

Wow. I can not believe it has been 6 weeks since my last blog entry! And now for all my excuses: December was so jam packed with parties, cleaning, wrapping and hosting that I litterally have just now caught my breath. The real truth of the matter, if I'm going to really dig deep and not be in denile, is that I have been hurting. Poor lil' ole me. I hate feeling sorry for myself but sometimes I just can't help it. I am hurting and I am a deep thinker. I ponder over things for hours. I am a true "obsessor". I can't tell if drama follows me or if I like the drama. I hate it once it is happening, that's for damn sure. So why all the bad decisions? I find myself hearing thoughts like, "You are just a really bad friend and you bring this upon yourself." I will always blame myself so much faster than anyone else could ever blame me. Sometimes I take the balme before there is even a problem and that results in an even bigger problem. I want to move away. I really feel like I'd be better off on a deserted island where I can't hurt people...or myself. The people I love so dearly have been so scared by me. They have either cut me out completley, they walk on MAJOR egg shells around me, or they haven't been around me enough for me to screw up and so they think I am totally awesome. Everyone loves me until they experience the daggar of pain that sheds blood all over the place. This daggar of mine is my tongue. To know this lack of self-control is in me, my breaks my heart. I want to make better decisions and be QUIET. I want to stop hurting my sisters, my husband, my mom, my dad and my friends. I can not run away like I've tried so often in the past. I am not at liberty to be selfish any longer because I have a precious baby boy now. I must stay grounded, get thicker skin, press on, and rejoice under all circumstances like the Father commands me to do. I must stop being a people- pleaser and breath in and out. I must learn to be calm and quiet in a group setting. I must practice loving others right where they are. The pain of all this and the stress of the holidays resulted in a 4 pound weight gain. I am 205 lbs today. I will try to love myself and speak kind words in my head. I must stop insulting Carter's mother and Mike's wife. I must show her some respect. It is time for me to embrace the pressures of the world and to stop dwelling on each tiny little bee sting that comes my way. I am pumped and ready to drop the next 20 pounds. With Spring (aka bathing suit season) around the corner the timing could not be more perfect!
Lord, please help me stay strong and reach this goal. To you be ALL the glory!