Let me start by saying I rejoice in the Lord under ALL circumstances! I know I can be what He has made me to be, and I am not giving up.
I am depressed because...
The Casey Anthony Trial makes me sick. I am fighting daily NOT to turn on the T.V. Instead of living my life I've been watching a lost soul destroy her life and everyone's around her.
Mike is always studying or working. I am so proud of him, but I miss him. I can not distract him by expressing its effect on me.
My house is upside down with stuff everywhere and I need to CLEAN!
It is hot as hell outside and I feel trapped.
My business partner may be leaving and I really don't want to lose him. However, as a friend I am so happy for the other business opportunity he and his precious wife have been given. GO LINDSEY AND RYAN!!! :)
I am SO upset for gaining 4 pounds over the last 2 weeks. How? Why? I will tell you. I have been eating way too much. I drank and ate and celebrated just because I wanted to have fun. Let me tell you...it WAS fun. SO much fun. I loved it, but it left me empty and depressed. I am done hiding from the truth of my small defeat. I want to stand back up and continue fighting this war! One battle lost, but how can I forget all the other many victories!?!?! I won't. I deserve more than that.
Plain and simple...I have been LAZY. I have been the queen of excuses and now I am paying for it. I have been living in fear and instant gratification.
PLAN:
Instead of filing my head with T.V. I must get in the Bible or a good book while my angel is sleeping. Then when he wakes up we need to go to the pool or run some errands. I know it's hot, but I have to get us out of the house regardless.
I must take advantage of Carter's nap time to straighten up the house and clean. I am happy when it is clean and I can not function otherwise.
I need to go to the store and buy groceries. I need to prepare healthy meals and protect myself from sabotaging my diet.
I need to be drinking more water...less diet drinks, less coffee, less WINE! Sparkling water and lime is a good idea.
I need to do a workout dvd or find time to go to the gym TODAY!!
I know I can do this with God's help. Please join forces and pray with me. This is so hard. I knew if would be and I am willing to face the hard times. It won't always be a blog with great results and amazing pictures...I need to be OK with myself when I fall so that I can quickly get back up. I want to succeed! AND I WILL.
